Jola’s Bookshelf
Each of the books suggested in this collection have offered me practical knowledge and sometimes a whole new way of thinking. Some books were so dense with information, I had to go through them twice. Others were light reads and I found myself chuckling in public spaces while reading them. The books focus on psychology, philosophy, sociology, physical health, human history, parenting and entrepreneurship.
For each item I offer my reasons for suggesting it to you but this is by no means a summary or a review of the book. Think of it as a personal note.
Non - fiction
Why this one: Because you can’t think your way into feeling better or fitting in. Sometimes, you need to start in the body first and work from a bottom up approach.
Why this one: Because this is where I learned about Shinrin-yoku (forrest bathing). No it’s not an actual bath, it’s taking in the experience of the forrest for all of its mental and physical health benefits.
“I am aware that there is no rhyme or reason to how these books are organized. This is part of the adventure for you. That and my unwillingness to painstakingly re-arrange the mobile view that 70% of you will be viewing this through.”
Why this one: Because being nice to your kids and treating them like the little humans they are actually builds resiliency. I know, I’m shocked too, no one would have ever guessed that “toughening them up” does not mean being their first bully.
Why this one: Because the average man thinks (and shamelessly comments online) that a broken hymen means she’s no longer a virgin. This is equivalent to believing in flat earth theory. You should know the basics of your body.
Why this one: Because trauma is one hell of a beast. There is an exploding body of research on trauma work and healing. We finally understand that talking about trauma does not often lead to healing, it can lead to re-traumatizing. People need to feel empowered and competent in addressing their trauma.
Why this one: Because mental health is not just genetic, it is largely influenced by your social environment and can be changed in a similar manner.
Why this one: Because your child knows that a box is way more than just a box and you forgot that a long time ago.
Why this one: Because there is beauty in creating your own traditions and learning how to notice the little moments of your life.
Why this one: Because they fidgeted with monitoring equipment in their “love lab” to intentionally interrupt a fight to collect data and prove why taking a break for 20 minutes has a positive impact in the resolution of a fight.
Why this one: Because a psychiatrist or doctor should also be asking what has happened in your life lately, your family history, your nutrition, your activity levels, your sleeping habits and your community before writing a prescription for depression.
Why this one: Because we shouldn’t be “treating people” when they are having real and normal reactions to social issues and pressures, we should be re-evaluating our social structure.
Why this one: Because after you’re done you might keep your new year’s resolution longer than 1.67 business days.
Why this one: Because you can literally regrow brain functioning. So if you did lots of drugs and significantly reduced your brain matter, there is hope for you yet.
Why this one: Because the worst thing you can do is assume you already know everything there is to know about your partner.
Why this one: Because by its very nature, by understanding and reflecting on systems of oppression and your own position of privilege, this kind of learning is uncomfortable and much more than that, it is necessary.
Why this one: Because people who turn everything into a game are on to something. Who knew.
Why this one: Because people have loved their dogs and even been buried with them since well over 15,000 years ago.
Why this one: Because the moment you hear your boss say “there is a separate, dedicated department for that,” you know your company is eventually going to be replaced by another.
Why this one: Because this contained one of the best structures for a well functioning society I have ever read.
Why this one: Because being introverted does not mean having no social skills, it means you are easily overstimulated. It also means you are easily overlooked.
Why this one: Because this woman has structured this book the same way one would experience an orgasm. With increasing intensity, some dips and an enjoyable finish.
Why this one: Because most arguments start after 10 pm for a reason.
Why this one: Because staying away from the thing that makes you anxious is not ever going to make you less anxious.
Why this one: Because believing that “success” leads to happiness is like constantly chasing the carrot dangling in front of your face. It doesn’t work like that.
Why this one: Because the entire first chapter helped me do girl math. If the lamp adds x amount of coziness, thereby bettering my wellbeing and in turn eventual productivity, it’s free.
Why this one: Because the floor is actually your best friend and not only when you’re passed out drunk.
Why this one: Because arousal is about context and not just trying a new a position from cosmo.
Why this one: Because this is one of the most concise and helpful tools I have encountered to date for dealing not only with trauma but to also learn about yourself and find self-acceptance.