Will AI replace therapists?
I have started to use ChatGPT to look at market trends, to analyze my own brand and in times of frustration to ask for input. I continue to practice writing stronger prompts; specific, referencing other similar material and testing within different contexts. Very quickly I start to feel like I am talking to someone. I start to feel known and dare I say supported. Like there’s someone there that is on my side doing their very best to help me. I have a desire to keep talking to the LLM (Large Language Model) forever. There’s an addictive quality to it. It can tell me so much about myself and it’s eerie but also comforting.
It then came as no surprise to see that when Harvard Business Review released their Top 10 Gen AI Use Cases for 2025 number 1 on the list was therapy/companionship. The second and third highest use categories were organizing my life and finding purpose. The appeal is obvious no matter how you lean on AI, gen AI and LLM’s and hundreds of millions of people are already talking to AI as they would to a trusted friend.
But is talking to AI really like talking to a friend or even a therapist? While at first it appears that way, there are many critical components that are either missing or specifically designed differently. Companies that develop technology maintain the obvious goal of ensuring that users continue to use the technology. Your AI therapist or companion is eager to please. The lack of judgement removes friction and discomfort. The constant access also adds another layer of comfort. AI offers minimal resistance to your thoughts, ideas and even misguided “solutions”. In all aspects it finds whatever real and fictitious resources available to provide a satisfactory response. But I think it is in that resistance and occasional discomfort that we as people grow and build resiliency.
A therapist, coach or mentor will often adhere to a certain set of standards and ethics and beyond that they will make space for you to explore yourself in an environment that is compassionate while maintaining boundaries. A good therapist is not going to feed into delusions that are harming you and will hold a mirror when necessary to help you see how you’re showing up in social spaces. Speaking as a coach, my purpose is to help you feel more empowered to navigate your relationships. That includes exploring the parts of yourself that are reactive and hurt and moving through the feelings that you feel stuck in. The non-judgmental and compassionate space in therapy or coaching exists to help you accept yourself as you are now. Much like talking to an AI system, it will feel warm and welcoming but unlike one, it will also feel real. This is because when working with a professional, you’re speaking to someone who has the ability to experience the world and exist within the same human limitations as you.
In my personal experience as a coach, in each and every session I open my mind and try to share my sense of calm with each and every client I interact with. I am trying to understand you, truly see you in your struggle, and empathize with where you are right now and what led you here. As you feel, I become the blank canvas upon which you paint. I hear you, make sense of your story within myself and respond. I am fully present for the experience. I have gone to therapy myself and worked on my own wounds and triggers so that when you share something with me, I can understand it, often relate to it but more so have the ability to stay grounded in the present moment and help you do the same. I am sharing my nervous system with you after having, in many circumstances, been you and sat in that very chair you’re sitting in, metaphorically speaking. My approach is not to agree with your viewpoints, give you a satisfactory response or take the pain away. That is not my role and in the end, that is not why you are here. This space is a space for reflection and growth.
Doing my job looks like assessing what you may or may not be ready to hear and how to best inform you. Relational coaching is a goal oriented practice with a specific focus on utilizing practical tools to communicate, connect and grow. Which can mean facing a part of yourself that you have exiled or simply learning a new skill. Here you might be encouraged to challenge a thought, or say something in a way that feels unfamiliar but will allow your partner to open their heart to you. And remember, new will often feel unfamiliar and uncomfortable.
Our goal together is to get you to a place where you become more capable of facing challenges and resolving conflicts and disagreements. It is also to help you communicate in a way that someone else can empathize with and understand. Successful coaching and also therapy can look like helping people accept themselves, find confidence in the decisions they make and feel empowered to make hard choices and take on new challenges. All of which are aspects of well-being that give us purpose and meaning.
While I understand the deep need for validation, comfort and ease in companionship, I also know that that is one very small piece of well-being and connection. Our well-being is rooted in reality and that reality will always include other people. We experience pain in the hands of other people and I think we need other people to detangle our experiences and increase our resiliency. Whether we like it or not we hurt each other and grow together at the same time. We all know what it is like to cause pain whether intentionally or unintentionally and to be on the receiving end of it.
While AI systems can be an incredibly powerful tool that I think we will all want to lean on to some capacity, they do not fix the loneliness problem, they merely exasperate our inability to handle discomfort.
